Think about what your dream life looks like. If you picture it, placing no constraints on yourself to keep it humble or realistic, what would your fairy tale best life be?  

 

In mine, I am a celebrated author and illustrator. I increase representation of Native American people, queer people, women, and other marginalized groups, and make them feel bigger and more powerful. I spend my days in a beautiful house and make the kind of money that allows for home renovations, world travel, a killer wardrobe, and providing stability for my closest loved ones – all from my own stories. I’ve got perennial bestsellers, a stack of awards, and get to do appearances, signings, and interviews all over the world.

 

In your fantasy, what have you achieved, and what reward does that give you? What is your daily life like in this dream, what do you spend your time doing?

 

What aspects of that dream life can you do right now? Today?

 

I can work on my stories. Every day, I make at least a little progress on my own projects. And I frequently share what I’m doing, with my husband or other artist and writer friends, so that I can get a little taste of that celebration I dream of, even if it’s just in the form of “Nice progress!” And every day I make my surroundings feel good to be in, and cheer on my friends and loved ones and help when they need it and I’m able, and spend some quality time with my husband and cats.

 

What are your tenets? What’s your Magnetic North?

 

Just like using an emotional keyword for a painting or a project, you can give yourself a compass by determining your main goals. These are the things that will build toward your dream life.

 

When I am presented with an opportunity or choice, like an offer for a new freelance assignment or project, I check whether it is bringing me closer or further from my goals. My list of goals is as follows:

 

  1. Make my own stories ★★★
  2. Special interest subject matter (Increase representation of Native people in particular, and queer people, women, and other marginalized people) (Horses) (Romantic vampires) ★★
  3. Make enough money to provide stability ★

 

When I have had opportunities that were good money but that would require painting overly sexualized women, I turned them down. When I’m offered a job which is a significant daily time commitment and would take time away from working on my own stuff, I weigh it against whether it would center representation (or horses or vampires) and what kind of reach the project has, and whether it pays well enough to fulfill the stability goal. That stability goal being third in that list means I am willing to have less stability in order to work in one of my special interests – but only if I am still able to satisfy my top priority of time for my own projects. I only take on work that satisfies at least 2 of my goals.  If I assign them a number of stars, I can add up a total and then only do the work that has a total of three stars or more.

 

You’ll notice this equation means there is no job I will do just for the money. That felt like a tough choice to make when I determined these goals for myself, but I have done jobs just for money before and those jobs do not contribute whatsoever to my longer term career and life goals. The money disappears like all money tends to do. The only lasting effect is that I’ve used up some of my precious time here on Earth. No thanks.

 

This list, and especially the top slot, functions as a magnetic north even when I’m doing things that seem unrelated to the list items. I need to spend a day cleaning? I can tilt the tasks toward my list by re-framing them in relation to it – if I do as much cleaning as I can on the cleaning day then it’s less life stuff to interrupt me later on when I’m back to work on my goals. I can listen to audiobooks as research for my stories. I can make my bedroom extremely restful so that I’m less likely to have difficulty falling and staying asleep, a problem that comes up for me when I’m in a creative high. I can reorganize so that the house is not just tidied up but is a more inspiring environment than it was – put up prints and artwork instead of storing them away, make my art supplies easier to reach, etc. I’m not cleaning to make it clean, I’m cleaning to make my environment better support my journey toward my goals.

 

The list is especially useful when you’ve got more than one good opportunity and need to compare them to choose which to spend your time on. I recently found myself facing a choice between two opportunities. One that could pay well and increase Native representation, but would take up so much time it was a step away from #1. The other one increases Native representation and is my own story (possible illustrated novel deal!)–  but it will require a significant time investment before possible pay in the form of a book advance. That’s 5, possibly 6 stars depending on the advance, which far outweighs the 3 stars of the first opportunity. Choice made!

 

What is your list?

 

What step can you take toward your magnetic north?